"Denise, are you OK?" It’s a question I get asked by friends, family and even followers who pass by my stall at bazaars. And I always say, “I’m OK.” But truthfully… I’m not really OK. My hands are getting weaker. Simple daily tasks like tying my hair, carrying things even just holding tools are becoming harder. My back is also weakening. It affects my posture and makes it difficult to sit, stand, or walk for long. Every day feels like a little more strength slipping away. But when someone asks if I’m OK, it warms my heart. Because it means someone still cares. That small question reminds me I’m not invisible.
So why am I still going to bazaars? Why am I still doing so many things? Because if I stop, I feel like I’ll fade even faster. I want to keep moving, keep creating, keep contributing instead of just sitting still, watching myself deteriorate day by day. No, I’m not truly OK. But… I’m still here. I’m still breathing. I’m still able to eat. I’m still able to move around. I’m still showing up. And that’s my way of fighting back for now. "I’ve always believed that God chose this path for me because He knew that I'm strong enough and could handle it better than any other."
And honestly, I feel so grateful when customers thank me for creating this food for them. It able to make their life easier and also healthier instead of buying junk from outside. To me, that’s a kind of encouragement. It reminds me that even with my limited strength, I can still do something meaningful for others. That feeling gives me the momentum to keep moving forward in life. And I feel lucky that God gave me quite a naturally optimistic mind. It helps me face everything with a bit more strength and calm.
No, I’m not truly OK. But… I’m still here. I’m still breathing. I’m still able to eat. I’m still able to move around. I’m still showing up. And that’s my way of fighting back for now. "I’ve always believed that God chose this path for me because He knew that I'm strong enough and could handle it better than any other."